“I started reading it and I came to this part….that completely changed the way I looked at depression and taking anti-depressants. You know how you always (unfortunately) look to other people to tell you that its alright, or that you’ll beat something….instead of telling yourself? I found this passage to be incredibly powerful….and I wanted to share it with you!” A brilliant woman named Gillian put this on Flickr, and it was too wonderful to keep to myself. Maybe I am the only one that can truly appreciate it… But I hope that’s not the case.
I just watched “Eat, Pray, Love“. When I got home this afternoon I was in the process (or trying to begin the process) of getting out of this lovely funk I woke up in. Main issue was that I didn’t feel like a damn thing in the world could help me do that. Mmm love that don’t you? Anywho, my appetite has been out of CONTROL the last few weeks, so the second I feel any anxiety/stress/boredom/emotion in general I turn to food. So, I ate a banana with some peanut butter (more so peanut better with a little banana, lets be real). Shortly after I decided that even though that’s one of my favorite snacks on the planet, it wasn’t hitting the spot. I wanted and needed a couple (a few) cups of black Rimini coffee and a meal, not a silly ass BANANA. Christ. Anyways, I ended up eating some Cous Cous and chicken with my coffee. Instead of doing yoga, or blogging, or meditating, or writing (which are all things I try and do when I have days like this) I sat my ass on the couch and turned on the TV. If you know me, you know that’s the last thing I usually resort to. But I had zero energy to do anything I’d normally do, so I started to look through netflix. Eat, Pray, Love came up and I thought to myself, “oh, perfect, the movie I’ve wanted to see for months as well as the book I bought that’s sitting on my book shelf with a crease in chapter 2….” NEEDLESS TO SAYYYY, it was the best thing I could have done to get myself out of this horrible funk-de-mothafuckin-funk. I sobbed, and sobbed, and sobbed a little more. Then I realized Spring Break was over and I had to be in class whether I had 2 hours left in the movie or not. So, I resumed the movie this evening after class. I soaked in some time with my beautiful Auntie Carolyn, sweet Talya, and handsome Zeb before I pushed play. Oh, and we can’t forget the tub of ice-cream I spent some time with, that would be rude. Anywho, it was amazing. As dumb and girly and silly as it sounds, we all need nights like these. I highly recommend allowing yourself one in the near future:) This is my first rambling post on La Vie Boheme, so I guess it’s officially my blog. Those of you who read “Drifting In between Dreams and Reality” are all too familiar with these kind of posts, but those of you who didn’t…. Welcome to my messy, beautiful, rambling world of chaos. As you can see, I don’t have it all quite figured out… But I’m beginning to be okay with that. And I guess that’s the most beautiful part about my day today. So sorry for the sloppy blogging, life is just kinda like that sometimes though right…. A messy but raw blog post. Sweet sleeps my loves, until next time. xoxox
“Sometimes to lose balance for love is part of living balance in life” -Eat, Pray, Love