Alone But Not Lonely

I remember being about 13 years old and going through pre-teen “funks”. I was (and still can be) a moody little shit. But I always knew what the solution was. I’d hurry home, play soccer until the sun went down, and then “redecorate” my bedroom. I would put in my favorite CD and go to town. Getting rid of things that no longer served a purpose and reflecting on the things that did (I was a weird kid). I’d always make my mom stay upstairs until I was done (which I’m sure she was thrilled about) and then reveal my “new and improved space” when I finished. I knew at a young age how much of an impact my personal space had on my mood.

With that little hobby came big dreams of having my own apartment. I imagined that it would have beautiful art, shelves full of books of poetry, romance, sorrow, and adventure…candles, music, plenty of plants, and soft pillows and large blankets. A place to relax and write, entertain the people I love, make memories, and dream . And I am incredibly blessed to say that my little shoe-box apartment is beginning to fit that description.

It’s been such a fun and rewarding process for me to make that dream into a reality. But like all good things it has taken time. I have added each piece that is in my home slowly, making sure that each object resonates with me some way or another.

A few months ago my aunt Carolyn told me that she wanted to buy me a piece of art for my home. I was so excited. But I’d been looking for a while and just couldn’t find anything that made me feel like I had to have it. Last weekend while my mom and aunt were out shopping they came across a piece at my favorite store, Dancing Cranes. They sent me a photo of it but I just wasn’t in the mindset at the time to make a decision about whether or not I wanted it.

For the past week I’ve been on my way home and thought about that piece as I drove past DC. Today all three of us went back to Dancing Cranes and it was still there. I guess that is how I knew that it was meant to be mine. I came home, hammered a nail into my paper-thin wall, and just stared at it. It’s perfect where it is.

The piece is called “You Found Me, Alone But Not Lonely.” It’s such an accurate symbol of where I am at in my life right now. The photo was taken in Bear Rive Migratory Bird Refuge.

You Found Me, Alone But Not Lonely.

I just finished reading Gabrielle Bernstein’s book “Spirit Junkie: A Radical Road to Self-Love and Miracles.” and it is now a new favorite of mine. So I decided to buy myself a new book to keep my reading flow going as well as a meditation pillow. I have been using a pillow from my bed or I’ve just sat on the floor while meditating, so I’m eager to have a comfortable place to gather my thoughts, pray, and meditate everyday.

The book I purchased is called “I Am Malala: The Girl Who Stood Up For Education and Was Shot By The Taliban.”

I truly believe that Malala is our youngest and most powerful female voice right now and that she will continue to do incredible things throughout her life. Her book has truly moved me. I’ve made a promise to myself to only read it when I have time to really allow her words to sink in and sit with me. I start school next month and her story has changed my prospective on getting my education as a female. I strongly encourage you to purchase it for yourself and/or someone you love.

"I Am Malala"Meditation pillow

I hope that you have had a weekend full of the things that bring you inner peace and joy. It can be hard to find time for ourselves during the holidays, and some people look down on it. But I find it absolutely essential to find a balance between giving love to others and giving love to yourself in order to be happy and healthy.

All my love, Bailey Mikell