“After spending time with a girl, you feel exhausted because she takes more than she gives. After spending time with a woman, you feel invigorated, because she empowers you with possibility, and a passion for life.” -Nadia Mah
“I do my thing and you do your thing.
I am not in this world to live up to your expectations,
And you are not in this world to live up to mine.
You are you, and I am I,
and if by chance we find each other, it’s beautiful.“
I apologize for the ‘quotey’ posts & extended time between comment replies — school/work are sucking me dry, bare with me sweets! Bee
Alright, can I get a hell yeah for Cris Cab? He is my new favorite artist (besides Frank Ocean, of course) I’m still browsing through his music to make sure it’s love and not lust. Either way one thing’s for sure, I am definitely in full on ‘like’ with Cris Cab.
The opening lyrics to his song “Good Girls” is:
“Hey man, I’ve learned my lesson
Got a good girl, count your blessings”
But what really stole my heart was this:
“good girls don’t grow on trees”
Oh hi, I’m sold! I love that because it is so true. It is so hard to find a partner that can give & understand the unique love your heart desires. We are all different therefore we all need different types of love. Unfortunately honesty, respect, patience, trust and kindness are becoming less important; The definition of a “healthy relationship” is very misunderstood to the men & women of my generation. Many of us have forgotten what it really means to love and be loved.
I do know one thing — Any woman will tell you this: a good man is hard to find & even harder to keep. I’m sure of it, because my town has an abnormal amount of douche-bags-in-diesels and a lack of gentlemen (not that I’m looking, but they’re everywhere! it scares me. ) But it goes the same for men, because like Cris Cab says, good girls don’t grow on trees. We have to honor, cherish, and embrace the beautiful relationships and love we have in our lives. Surround yourself with people that make you feel excited — I can honestly say I have people in my life that make my stomach feel like a million fireflies are having a freaking fiesta in there. Absolutely electric. They encourage me to be the best woman I can be. Because of those people I believe in my dreams and I’m brave enough to do anything & everything in order to reach them. Those are the kind of people we all deserve to have in our lives.
At the end of the day this is my opinion, so as my grandmother says “take it, leave it, file it away, or never look at it again”. Alls I’m sayin’ is I encourage you to be picky about one thing: the type of love/people you choose to surround yourself with.
It can change your life.
Look around, I am sure your eyes will stop on the girl that picks fights with her boyfriend because she is seeking more attention. More love. More, more, more. What you don’t know is he gives her everything she could ever ask for, and he can’t quite understand the reasoning behind her love for petty little fights. He tries to be patient with her, he tries to give it time. After months, their relationship comes to an end. Life feels sane without her temper. She has been burned, and she attracted everything she never wanted.
Then you’ll see that boy that finally found himself a good girl. She has helped ease his edges & shed light on his soft heart. She sits with him and walks him through every question on his homework he just can’t figure out. She is patient, she is kind, she does not judge him. But suddenly he is done, he is done with the love he knows he needs because he is not ready for it. She has been burned.
None of these people asked to be hurt, but in the long run all four of them walked away with diamonds that were once coal. You live and you learn & sometimes it is going to burn. I have grown enough to realize the bad relationships in my past have lead me to the love I have always dreamed of. But it began with myself. Self-love creates a net that is made to catch soul-mates.
If you have been hurt, begin with yourself. Compliment who you are on a daily basis, learn to adore every inch of yourself – Inside and out. Thank the men/women who said no to your love! Thank them for leading you to a new path, one with promise & excitement. Love is not always fun. In fact it is often dark & lonely.
Start writing your lessons you learn down, even if your hand trembles. Forget sleeping with your backs to each other, and promise to never let the sun set upon an argument again. Slowly but surely you will find each other where you can love one another with all your heart. You matter. Be with someone who knows that.
Until then, be patient. The best things come with time. Perhaps we cannot appreciate real love until we are burned – So let go, free yourself, and take a step into the unknown. Love will find you.