It’s dark because you are trying too hard. Lightly child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly. Yes, feel lightly even though you’re feeling deeply. Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them. I was so preposterously serious in those days, such a humorless little prig. Lightly, lightly – it’s the best advice ever given me…So throw away your baggage and go forward. There are quicksands all about you, sucking at your feet, trying to suck you down into fear and self-pity and despair. That’s why you must walk so lightly. Lightly my darling, on tiptoes and no luggage, not even a sponge bag, completely unencumbered. -Aldous Huxley, Island
Last night I felt like I was going to rip someones head off. So I was really unproductive while I escaped in the bath tub because I was being an evil bitch & needed to have a moment. And that I did. But, today is a new day & that is the beauty in life. So I turned it around, faked it till I made it, & had an awesome day.
After a successful day of training at work I went to Shannons. I was able to spend time with she and the girls, Taylor & Tanner, as well as Chris & Charlie. Before I knew it I had a happy belly, snorts in between laughter & only 30 minutes before I planned on being in bed. So instead of getting all sorts of crazy from moving anxiety, I decided to keep calm & spend some time with some of the people I love – And it was so nice.
Sometimes it’s a sign when you have a big project but keep putting it off for things like dates with a bag of York Mints in bed with Ellie Goulding turned up really loud (that was last nights excuse, betcha’ never heard that one before). A sign that is trying to say, ‘Stop being a tight ass & breathe. And have one more mint. Oh, & get OUT of the house for gods sake.’
I don’t know what I would do without all of the strong, positive, uplifting people in this little village of mine. Or all of the candy from my stocking. Needless to say, I feel refreshed & so not evil. I’m going to go plan my outfit for tomorrow like I used to every night from 7-11th grade (Senior year = Nobody cares, just get me the hell out of here), and go to sleep! It feels good to have adult responsibilities & child-like guilty pleasures.
My job is to love you. Even if I don’t always see eye to eye with you, I know there is a rhyme to all our own little reasons. Instead of trying to understand other people, I’m working hard on embracing them. Often we spend so much time trying to decode others that we waste the opportunity to welcome new beauty, insight, and love into our lives.
Adrienne posted this quote on facebook yesterday & I feel like it relates to this in many ways…
There is so much good in the worst of us,
And so much bad in the best of us,
That it hardly behooves any of us
To talk about the rest of us.
-Edward Wallis Hoch